The Northern Illinois Conference Anti-Racism Task Force has been an eye-opener for this elderly Caucasian country girl. 

Toni Lucas (front) during the pilgrimage on the Bridge in Selma, AL

When I first moved from Kentucky back to my home state of Illinois and began attending NIC Annual Conferences, I was most disgruntled. All of the statistical reporting about the makeup of conference committees as to age, gender, and ethnicity seemed to me to be much ado about nothing. That feeling grew to anger when I asked to serve on a committee that was seeking new members, and I was turned down. I was basically told that the committee already had enough old white ladies. I tromped home in my little white boots and thought, “See if I ever volunteer again! Doesn’t ability and willingness count for anything?” And I also thought, “The church is just like the State of Illinois. It’s all about Chicago!” 

I sulked for a few years, and then I became a Certified Lay Minister. Not long after that the Anti-Racism Task Force was established, and a plea went out for members. Though I was still wearing my little white boots and fussing about Chicago, I have always been passionate about justice. And I didn’t see any nonsense about gender, age, or ethnicity in the pleas, so I raised my hand. 

 Actually, I think God raised my hand! What a journey it has been! 

I hate the word “woke,” but my grandson used the word so I guess I’ll be OK with it. 

I’ve worn many ARTF hats in the past few years and attended a retreat. Oh my! I surely didn’t know what I didn’t know! I’m a farmer’s daughter who grew up in an area where everyone looked just like me. (It was somewhat unsettling to learn that was by design.) And even at a time when I worked in Chicago and lived in the ’burbs, my church and friends were white.  

My mother’s people lived in the South and things were different there. My parents didn’t agree with some of those things, but there was no real discussion about anything. That was just how it was.  

Though my “awakening” had begun before that, I was fully awakened when I went on a civil rights pilgrimage with the Indiana Conference in 2022. I recommended that NIC should do something similar and, just like that, I was chair of the NIC 2023 Civil Rights Pilgrimage! Through these two pilgrimages, I looked at the South through other lenses. Our theme was “Educate to Advocate.” Last year we were educated, this year we advocated, through an April 18 Lobby Day in Springfield. 

If our rural northwestern Illinois country church were not part of the conference that includes the City of Chicago, I would never have had the opportunity to know and work with people of other ethnicities. Now I really do have friends of other ethnicities and not a token co-worker or acquaintance.  

While I still feel the NIC could do more for the rural church, the very things I disliked I now appreciate. I do still sometimes feel there are too many restrictions about committee makeup, but I truly understand the reason for those rules. 

I have learned SO much. What a shock it has been to learn that racism is built into the American life, so much so that we don’t even realize it. Maya Angelo said, “Do the best you can until you know better. Then, when you know better, do better.” I’m certainly trying to do better. Thank you, Northern Illinois Conference, for the opportunity to learn and grow.